G.I. JOE: RETALIATION (2013)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *sociological*                                                                                                                                                   There's so little entertainment in RETALIATION that I had less fun re-watching it (having barely remembered the first viewing) than in concocting the following theory: that these two live-action G.I. JOE feature films recapitulate the unrelated (save by content) history of the MCU phases.                                                                                       

 From what I've read about the making of the 2009 RISE OF COBRA (which appeared one year after the debut of the MCU's breakout hit IRON MAN), the filmmakers didn't originally intend to make a close adaptation of their source material. How those original intentions would have turned out, no one can say, but some insider leaked those plans to the Internet. The makers, who in those days actually wanted to please their audience and thereby make money, reworked their existing script to work in all the usual gang of Cobra-crooks as adversaries for the heroic Joes. RISE is no classic, but it is, like the majority of the MCU's first three phases, generally decent formula-fare. In contrast, RETALIATION is like nearly everything that followed the MCU's Phase Three, stuffed with cynical grandstanding, poorly conceived spectacles, and overconfidence as to the makers' ability to make the customers line up and pay for tickets.                                                                                                       

You might think, for instance, that after the financial success of RISE, no production team would be dumb enough not to copy the essence of both the preceding film and the successful franchise-- said essence being the appeal of seeing America defended by a cadre of gonzo commandos with wacky code-names and oddball gimmicks. True, RISE focused mostly on four of the heroes (Scarlett, Ripcord, Snake Eyes and Duke) and the three main villains (The Baroness, Cobra Commander and Destro). But there were six or seven other Joes contributing to the heroic goings-on, so the sense of the franchise's original intent was preserved. Not so RETALIATION. Channing Tatum's Duke is only in the movie long enough to get killed off, as are various other Joes, thanks to a "first strike" by Zartan, who was left on the loose at the end of RISE. Most of the narrative follows three surviving Joes, none of whom were in the previous film, as they seek a means to retaliate: Flint (DJ Cotrona), Lady Jaye (Adrienne Palicki), and, perhaps most consequentially, Roadblock as played by that 300-pound gorilla Dwayne Johnson. Given how Johnson's history of spotlight-stealing negatively impacted 2022's BLACK ADAM, I think I'm justified in speculating that the script was written to play up Johnson's dubious charms at the box office. Palicki and Cotrona have almost nothing to do, as does Bruce Willis in a throwaway support-role. The other two heroes in the film's ensemble-- Snake Eyes (Ray Park) and Jinx (Elodie Yung) -- are not so sidelined, but only because they occupy a separate story-arc, in which they pursue another of Cobra's allies: the elusive Storm Shadow (Lee Byung-Hun).                                               

 Though RETALIATION is poorly paced and only a few spectacles are worth looking at, I will admit that Cobra's evil plot makes more sense than the one in RISE. This time the villains aren't unleashing a superweapon capable of destroying the world they too occupy. They've simply got their disguise-master Zartan (Arnold Vosloo) impersonating the President in order to destroy the Joes and to put Cobra in control of the world. Aside from that Storm Shadow subplot, it's almost entirely Cobra Commander's show, for the master villain leaves his former comrade Destro in prison and the fate of the reformed Baroness is never revealed. The leader does bring a minor henchman out of mothballs, Firefly (Ray Stevenson), but his only function is to have a couple of throwdowns with Johnson's Roadblock. (I almost want to say it's just "Johnson," because this role feels like almost every other part "The Rock" ever essayed.)       

 The only actor well-served by the script is the aforementioned Storm Shadow. The first film set up the quasi-sibling rivalry he shared with Snake Eyes and alluded to his supposed murder of his uncle/mentor, and RETALIATION does at least provide closure for that storyline. One of the few praiseworthy spectacles in the film is a bang-up ninja-battle between Snake and Shadow, concluded only when Jinx renders Shadow unconscious with knockout gas. Since Jinx is said to be Shadow's niece, I assume there was some idea of building up some drama in this conflict, but nothing is done with the subject; she gets a couple of decent fights but on the whole she's as underserved as Palicki and Cotrona. But in both films Lee Byung-Hun projects indomitable ferocity in this potentially cartoonish character, putting Johnson and his "ain't-I-a-cute-asskicker" routine to shame. In any case, though RETALIATION made decent box office, no sequel manifested, possibly because the filmmakers holding the franchise couldn't figure out what to do next. I know simple incompetence is not usually the thing that kills franchises-- certainly the MCU just keeps chugging along despite numerous failures-- but I find it pretty to think so.