IL MONACO DI MONZA (1963)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *uncanny*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *comedy*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *sociological*

I've now watched two subtitled comedies starring Italian comedian Toto. I find his humor too dependent on the nuances of the Italian language, which may be a lot funnier to natives of his country.

Still, there's potential in this parody of a popular melodrama, THE NUN OF MONZA. Poor widowed cobbler Pasquale (Toto) has twelve kids to feed, but local officials try to tax every dime out of him. He sees that the local monks are always well fed, so he and a companion masquerade as monks, while the kids pretend to be their retinue. 

They happen across the castle of the Marquise Don Egidio (Nino Taranto). He's holding as captive his beautiful sister-in-law Florenza (Lisa Gastoni), and their dialogue implies that Egidio arranged for his brother's death in order that he could marry Florenza. However, at some point Florenza cohabited with a lover, Don Emanuel, and is now pregnant. Through her window Florenza sees the phony monks and sends them a message, promising riches for her rescue. The phonies insinuate themselves into the Marquise's confidence, who wants Pasquale to officiate over his wedding to Florenza. Pasquale informs Florenza of his true intentions and proceeds to find ways to stall the wedding, so that Egidio becomes increasingly irate. He mentions that he once punished a false friar by entombing him behind a wall in his dungeon.

Toto's antics get pretty tiresome, so that I welcomed it when Edigio pretended to be dead (even looking a little like a vampire at one point) in order to learn the monks' true intention. When he learns the truth, the evil Marquise has Pasquale and Florenza bound, each to opposing wall-slabs. Some sort of piston-device will drive the slabs together, crushing the two victims into one another and between the stone slabs-- which is certainly a novel take on the "moving wall" from Poe's "Pit and the Pendulum."

Pasquale's companion seeks help from a local convent, looking for Don Emanuel. Instead he finds the Don's sister Virginia (Moira Orfei), who is (or is pretending to be) the head nun of the convent. She rouses a dozen other nuns from the order, some or all of whom may be simply young women who took the veil to avoid the attentions of lusty Edigio. The nuns attack the castle, at one point trampling over three henchmen and reducing them (somehow) to skulls and bones. Then the martial monacas engage in battle with Edigio and his guards and beat them roundly, with Virginia both punching and swordfighting Edigio. Don Emanuel only shows up when all the fighting's done, and to Edigio's horror, he's almost the spitting image of Pasquale (naturally, he's also played by Toto).

Since I didn't find Toto that amusing, the high point for me is that for once Moira Orfei is in a period film where she's not playing a villain, gets some brief combat scenes, and even remains alive at story's end. 

BATMAN: CAPED CRUSADER (2024)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *psychological, sociological*

I suppose there are a few episodes of CRUSADER that I might rate as "fair," but the overall approach of the showunners is so deeply flawed that I give this ten-episode streaming series an overall poor rating in mythicity and everything else.

Bruce Timm was enlisted to come up with a new take on his monumental accomplishment of the 1990s, BATMAN THE ANIMATED SERIES. Not all of those episodes were superb, but the outright poor ones are far outnumbered by the stories that were at least good basic formula. CRUSADER's problem, though, stems from that age-old difficulty: where does one go from up?

Timm has claimed that CRUSADER gave him the chance to employ some of the "adult" storylines he couldn't use for the 1990s series. But all the supposedly mature content of the show is thoroughly superficial. Timm and his creative collaborators-- ostensibly Matt Reeves (director of THE BATMAN) and comics-writer Ed Brubaker-- change up some characters' races, genders, and professions. But most of the changes have no textual meaning; they are "change for the sake of change," designed to startle fans expecting only minor variations on established themes. 

One of the least mismanaged changes is that Batman, in keeping with his faux-1940s Gotham locale, looks a lot like the Batman of his debut year, with a leaner build and longer bat-ears-- which is at least a decent design. While the hero becomes less Herculean, his butler Alfred becomes portly, which is a callback to the character's original design, and since there's no Robin this time, he's the hero's only confidante. There's a very small character advancement between the two of them, but it hardly makes up for all of the terrible bastardizations of the other characters-- as I'll touch on, episode by episode.

IN TREACHEROUS WATERS-- In addition to debuting the new versions of Batman/Bruce Wayne and his butler, this episode introduces the new versions of Commissioner Gordon and daughter Barbara. Gordon is largely unchanged except for being race-swapped, but the new Barbara is altered into a defense attorney. This was done so that she could compete in court with prosecutor-and-aspiring-mayor Harvey Dent, but she's a thoroughly unlikable character, even though in theory she, unlike Dent, is supposed to be on the side of the angels. Gang-boss Rupert Thorne controls the city and many cops, including formerly righteous officer Bullock, are in his pocket. But one of Thorne's competitors is a gender-swapped Penguin, who's given some sort of bizarre Ethel Merman persona as a chanteuse who's also a criminal mastermind. I'll say this for the showrunners, they weren't embarrassed to put their worst foot forward.

AND BE A VILLAIN-- Police detective Renee Montoya, who now sports shoulders like those of a linebacker, goes looking for a killer of actors, and finds The Shadow-- I mean, a version of the Golden Age villain Clayface, who just happens to resemble The Shadow at one point. The most I can say for this one is that the original antagonist wasn't all that great to begin with. Still, the 1990s series took some unpromising characters and improved them, including the Silver Age Clayface, so the second episode is batting 0 to 2.

KISS OF THE CATWOMAN -- Well, at least this version of The Catwoman is sexy and wears the classic green-and-purple costume, but those are the only things that align with the Golden Age character. This Selina Kyle is a spoiled heiress who likes having beautiful things so much that she starts stealing them. She comes into conflict with Batman and tries to mess with his mind by romancing him, but this Batman finds no allure in sexy criminals. I suspect that this "devil may care" formulation may have been borrowed from the comics-character Nocturna, since this same season uses the Nocturna name for a totally different character. The episode also introduces Doctor Harleen Quinzell, now race-swapped to be Asian.

NIGHT OF THE HUNTERS-- The Gotham cops are under pressure to bring in the masked vigilante. Bullock and his equally corrupt partner Flass are advised by Quinzell that Batman has a special animus for costumed crooks. They make possible the escape of notorious pyromaniac Firebug, along with his flame-throwing costume, even though it ensures that he will place innocent civilians in danger with his fire-making. I suppose the "adult" part of the story is that after Batman quells the menace, Flass and Bullock take the credit and are at least temporarily elevated.

THE STRESS OF HER REGARD-- We start off with a visual reference to the King Tut character of the 1966 Bat-series, but we're a long way from Victor Buono. Harleen Quinzell, in addition to dating Renee Montoya and being an old classmate of Barbara Gordon, has for some time been abducting multi-millionaires in order to brainwash them. It's not clear if Quinzell benefits by getting the rich guys to give their money away. For the most part she seems to be doing some sort of Robin Hood thing, but with no one in Gotham noticing all of these unexpected bounties to charities. The escape of the King Tut victim triggers an investigation by Barbara and Batman, but the story seems mostly concerned with making the "new Harley Quinn" into a sympathetic villain, since, hey, she only abused rich people.

NIGHT RIDE-- This is one of the few "fair" episodes. A phantom highwayman, billed as The Gentleman Ghost, begins robbing Gotham's conveyances, and slowly the rationalistic Batman must deal with the fact that this villain is genuinely supernatural. He gains some aid from a magician named Midnight, on loan from the CONSTANTINE comics-universe, and his presence makes this episode one of the few genuine crossovers in CRUSADER. The story's highlight is a ritual that Batman can only perform with the help of Alfred. Alfred is briefly possessed by the evil spirit, and there's an allusion to the butler harboring some deep secret, which presumably will come out in Season 2.

MOVING TARGET-- A gang of assassins, led by a GREEN ARROW villain named Onomatopoeia, come to Gotham seeking a victim, whom everyone thinks is Commissioner Gordon. Gordon, Barbara and other cops hole up in a safe house, but the assassins find them anyway. Barbara gets a lot of story-attention but she's still a drudge of a character. TARGET could have still been an adequate crime story, but it's spoiled by another game of "let's-change-a-character's-associations-so-we'll-amaze-our-audience."

NOCTURNE-- Well, anyone who wanted to see Batman beat up by Wednesday Addams, here's your chance. The original Nocturna was a sexy femme fatale from 1980s BATMAN comics, though a later iteration made her some sort of vampire-- though still, from what I can tell, an adult woman. The original was a dispossessed heiress whose adoptive brother, Anton Knight, became her maybe-lover and went about stealing valuable items for Nocturna. I suppose the showrunners had some burning need for a carnival episode, because this time Anton is a down-at-heels mad scientist who does a carnival act with his tweener-looking sister Nocturna. I think she's supposed to be some sort of non-supernatural vampire who sucks people's souls, and for some reason she only victimizes children. Again we see a CRUSADER script trying to trade on continuity by naming the victims after some of the canonical Robins-- Dick, Jason, Carrie and Stephanie. Oh, and there's also a non-criminal version of Killer Croc and Bruce Wayne's Golden Age girlfriend Julie Madison. But it's all at best mediocre. 

THE KILLER INSIDE ME/SAVAGE NIGHT -- Several episodes keep coming back to the running subplot about Harvey Dent running for Gotham's mayor, including how he started accepting financial aid from Boss Thorne. Then at the end of NOCTURNE he betrayed the gangster and got a faceful of acid. He struggles with his mutilated appearance, and eventually goes over the dark side and starts killing Thorne's minions, though this Dent never takes on the "double-ness theme" of the comics villain. I won't reveal his fate, but I found it even more underwhelming that the one Dent suffered in Nolan's DARK KNIGHT. One of the few effective moments involves the aforementioned relationship between Batman and Alfred, but little else resonates. Finally, the Joker, conspicuous by his absence, is teased as an opponent for the probably inevitable Season 2.  

My spot-analysis of the series is that, in the creators' quest to avoid duplicating the 1990s show, they sacrificed the intense tone of "noir poetry" that had been used for both down-and-dirty crimes and absurd super-villainy. The 1990s series took some inspiration from the successful Tim Burton live-action movies, but it's likely the Matt Reeves BATMAN is one of the new models, and thus CRUSADER sacrifices poetry for a mannered naturalism. Head writer Ed Brubaker was a natural choice for this creative orientation, and though I don't know all of Brubaker's comics-work, I found his CATWOMAN run marked by the same dull naturalism I see here. No matter how successful the streaming show may be, I predict that the desire to keep CRUSADER distinct from the original Timm-verse will remain paramount, and that there will be no real chance for significant improvement.

THE MASTER OF DISGUISE (2002)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *uncanny*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *comedy*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *sociological*

In addition to DISGUISE being a box office flop, it's been deemed one of "the most painfully unfunny comedies ever made." While there were probably a lot of reasons for the film's misfire, I don't think its worst problem was being a loose assemblage of jokes, since a lot of successful comedies have extremely loose plotlines. 

The worst problem IMO stems from not investing any attention to the story's core concept. Pistachio Disguisey (Dana Carvey) lives an ordinary life in modern-day New York until his father and mother are kidnapped. Pistachio's grandfather then reveals a family secret kept hidden from Pistachio since his birth: that the Disguiseys belong to an ancient order that uses a familial "master of disguise" to bring about justice. This in itself is not that bad a concept: more or less crossing the concept of Lee Falk's PHANTOM with the idea of a chameleon-hero. But actor/writer Carvey couldn't just stick with having the Disguiseys fight justice in the style of Phantom-type heroes-- as Pistachio's father (James Brolin) is seen doing at the film's opening, turning himself into Bo Derek to catch a crook. Instead, he too often succumbs to dopey japes in the fashion of his successful work in the WAYNES WORLD series, like claiming that in the 1860s a Disguisey masqueraded as Abraham Lincoln to help Honest Abe win the Presidency. Because Carvey didn't make his premise even slightly logical, the whole concept unravels.

The international criminal Bowman (Brent Spiner), the fellow put in prison by Pistachio's father, seeks revenge by forcing the elder Disguisey to commit crimes with his abilities, while holding Pistachio's mother hostage. Pistachio's grandfather (Harold Gould) reveals to Pistachio his heritage, but doesn't think the kidnapping of his son important enough to participate in any rescues himself. What we get are protracted sequences of lumbering humor about the training-process, which among other things, includes the idea that the Disguiseys only fight by slapping their opponents. There's a vague claim that at some point Pistachio may become overtaken by some weird mental symbiosis with the people he impersonates, but this comes to absolutely nothing.

Pistachio himself seems pretty laid-back about rescue-plans, so much so that he finds time to engage an assistant in his endeavors (Jennifer Esposito). Romance of course blooms over time, though for once the male protagonist doesn't instantly fall for the gorgeous lead actress, for reasons I'll go into later. Esposito's character quite naturally considers Pistachio a geek, albeit one who pays well, but she's eventually won over when he uses his arcane slap-fighting to take down a bully. The assistant helps keep Pistachio on track and guides him to Bowman's estate, though she herself gets kidnapped. Pistachio uses his disguise-powers to take different identities, including that a human-sized cherry pie that can spit cherries at assailants, but he gets his act together to beat down Bowman's troop of ninjas and save both his parents and his new girl.

It's painful to dwell on most of MASTER's labored jokes, but only one comes close to working. The reason Pistachio doesn't immediately go gaga over his assistant is because he's Italian, and he's culturally programmed to want potential mates to have big butts, unlike the svelte-bodied Esposito. Somehow Bowman knows of this proclivity, and as a backup defense he unleashes on the hero a squad of "big booty girls." Pistachio has to resist his natural instincts in order to choose his non-steatopygous girl over this threat. But even though this was one of the few jokes that evolved out of character, it was excluded from the main story and included within the inter-credit bonus material.  

THE CROW: CITY OF ANGELS (1996)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *metaphysical*

I don't often subscribe to the "lightning in a bottle" theory of creativity. It often sounds like the idea that creative works are born more of inspiration than the more mundane perspiration. But in the case of the 1994 CROW, James O'Barr original comics-concept of an undead avenger melded perfectly with the diverse talents of director Alex Proyas and his writing-team. The film's success spawned three more feature films and a TV series, and most of them are just OK formula-fodder. The first sequel, though, proves the worst of the lot, hurt by the filmmakers' attempt to copy the original only in broad strokes.

One of the sequel's big mistakes was to bring back one of the few surviving support-characters, the child Sara, as an adult character (Mia Kirshner), a tattoo artist who finds life in Los Angeles no more pleasing than her earlier existence in Dreadful Detroit. The fact that she simply trades one bad phase of life for another in effect jinxes the audience's investment in the film, much the way the death of Newt undermined ALIEN 3. There's so little advantage gained from using her as a link to the first "Crow-avenger" that writer David S. Goyer would have done better to start fresh. She only supplies the New Undead-- the significantly named "Ashe" (Vincent Perez) with some minor guidance in his new role in the scheme of things, as well as applying some rather inconsistent face-paint to keep Ashe roughly in the Eric Draven mold.

I don't know how responsible director Tim Pope was for the visual look of the film-- he claimed that the studio had interfered with the filming of ANGELS-- but he certainly got the nod because he'd proven himself as a successful maker of music videos, so I tend to think that for the most part the film looks the way he wanted it to look. But where Proyas' Detroit looked fearful and imposing, Pope's L.A. just looks mean and depressing. (Maybe not that far from the L.A. of this century...)

Goyer's other main idea of a major change-up is that Ashe is killed with his young son instead of with a girlfriend, though there's nothing all that compelling about the loss of Ashe's offspring. The lack of a romantic connection also gives Adult Sara a chance at a somewhat doomed relationship with the hero, which also proves desultory. The killers, just like the first film, are another gang of bizarre drug-dealers, led by a flamboyant nut named Judah Earl (Richard Brooks). And whereas Top Dollar had his weird half-sister reveal to him the secret of the avenger's powers, Judah has a blind prophetess, given the fairly predictable name of "Sybil." It's possible Goyer and Pope thought they were being deeply symbolic with their assortment of prophets and tattoo parlors, but all of these references are entirely meretricious.

On top of all that, the action scenes aren't that impressive either, while at the climax, Ashe reveals a new power just because it's convenient. So CITY OF ANGELS belongs to the long list of sequels that utterly failed to put across even a formulaic notion of a series-concept. After this, Pope mostly concentrated on more music videos, while Goyer worked on a lot of projects within the superhero idiom, albeit with extremely uneven results.

WARCRAFT (2016)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *fair*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *metaphysical, sociological*

I probably would have been moderately entertained had I seen this film in its theatrical run, despite knowing nothing of the video game. The filmmakers spared no expense in bringing this basic D&D project to life, so there was lots of fantastic eye-candy, albeit nothing strikingly original. I can believe the claim by director/co-writer Duncan Jones that the original script was "stale." The trouble is: all he and his co-writer were able to do was pump up the three main characters with little bits of character elaboration, as opposed to reworking the basic conflict to make it more imaginative.

In the dimension of the huge green humanoids called "orcs"-- which I *think* was supposed to harbor a human-like race as well, based on the backstory of the Garona character-- the dominant ogre-like beings are in danger of having their own world destroyed, so with the help of their sorcerer, they invade the human-dominated world of Azeroth and begin seeking to conquer it. Two main male characters, war-chieftain Lothar (Travis Fimmel) and fledgling wizard Khadgar (Ben Schnetzer) -- become among the first to alert their fellows to their peril. In due course, the humans gain intel from a "half-orc" woman, Garona (Paula Patton), who looks mostly human except for green skin and a prominent underbite. Having learned of the orcs' desire to take Azeroth for themselves, the humans and their wizards muster defenses, resulting in a lot of swords and a fair amount of sorcery.

One problem with the script is that it broadcasts early on that the very magic the orc-sorcerer is using may rebound upon his people-- and thus, there's not much suspense about this revelation. Lothar, Khadgar and Garona are all mildly appealing, and the actors comport themselves well in these limited roles. But most of the story feels well-worn, and a depressing ending-- possibly meant to set up a sequel-- ensured that WARCRAFT wasn't going to be any sort of competition for LORD OF THE RINGS. I only grant the film "fair" mythicity because it does seek to work out the dynamics of the orcs' warrior-based society, however inadequately.

WRATH OF THE NINJA: THE YOTODEN MOVIE (1987/2003)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *fair*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *metaphysical*

This medieval ninja-movie has a complicated history. It's not a bad little story, but I did rather wish it had been better, to justify reading up on its twists and turns.

Under the name YOTODEN, this narrative originally appeared in Japan between 1987 and 1988 in the form of three separate OVAs, each about forty minutes long. In 1989 the story was cut down to 90 minutes for an English dub, WRATH OF THE NINJA, which saw general release. The dubbed version I watched online was from 2003 and its subtitle indicates that this edition worked in four extra scenes not present in the 1989 version. Not having seen the other versions, I can't draw any comparisons.

WRATH takes place in the historical Sengoku period of Japan, and includes a famous historical personage, Oda Nobunaga, but makes him into a sort of demon-lord. Nobunaga and his allies bring a ninja clan, the Oboro, under their command, and they wipe out three other historical ninja clans. Three individuals from each clan survive and pledge themselves to destroy Nobunaga and his demon hordes.

Roughly the first half hour deals with the three survivors making common cause, though of the three, Ryoma never seems to develop well, though that may be the result of cuts. The other male hero, Sakon, is the first hero seen on screen, just before he engages in battle with the third survivor, female Ayame, though their short fight is broken up when the Oboro attack both of them. Eventually the three gather their forces and meet with other warriors allied against Nobunaga. 

Though there's some decent action and characterization here-- with the latter focused mostly on Ayame-- the edited version I saw often seemed to be marking time until the climactic conflict. One stratagem used-- probably the same as in the OVA format-- was to run down the list of seven badass Oboro villains, all with different forms and powers. Frankly, I was more invested in a subplot in which Sakon showed some romantic interest in Ayame, even though I suspected there would be no happy ending for any of the principals. And indeed, Ayame alone survives the climax. And since the video's advertising spotlights Ayame rather than all three ninja warriors, it could be argued-- for anyone who cares-- that she's the central character here.

NINJA GAIDEN (1991)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *metaphysical*

NINJA GAIDEN was a popular eighties video game, enough to spawn this OAV of less than an hour's length. GAIDEN the OVA sustains a little curiosity in that it was a sequel to events in the immediately preceding video game, in contrast to most video adaptations of games, which are usually independent. I don't know if anyone watching films today remembers the video game well, but probably anyone can watch the OVA without previous knowledge.

The story is a simple good vs. evil opposition between "the Dragon Gods" and "the Gods of Evil," an opposition which has lasted into modern times. Apparently the game's protagonist Ryu Hayabusa won a great victory over the Evil Gods, but they're still not down for the count. Their earthly collaborators set up a scientific institution in New York, supposedly medical in nature, though the actual purpose is to create monsters, in which the Evil Gods will become incarnate on Earth. A sidenote claims that the Dragon Gods have been sealed away, but Ryu, the Dragon Gods' champion, also happens to live in New York with girlfriend Irene. This leads me to wonder what might have happened had the Evil Gods set up their operation anywhere but where their nemesis happened to live.

 An online history relates that only Ryu, Irene and one other support-character are from the game proper, and the OAV adds three other allies to Ryu and Irene. None of them prove any more memorable than the simplistic main character, so the additional characters were probably included just to provide more talking heads. There's one amusing sequence where a lady reporter has some "girl talk" with Irene about the state of the latter's relationship with the hero, and that's it.

There's not a lot of action, though when the story ramps up, the fight-scenes display the bloodiness characteristic of nineties anime. Some of the demons are reasonably grotesque, which is all that makes up for the sketchiness of both good and bad guys. If this had been a longer OAV it might have expanded on the history of the warring deities, but that would be no guarantee that the characters would have been any better. GAIDEN is a pleasant diversion for those who like nineties action-anime, nothing more.