Sunday, December 25, 2022

WITCHMAS (2020)

 





PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *comedy*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *metaphysical*

I'm sure there are dozens of bad animated features littering the streaming services, just so that parents can plop their kids down in front of reasonably safe kid-fodder. I almost never look at any of these, but the copy for WITCHMAS said something about a bunch of monsters unleashed by the titular witch, name of Selma. (Selma? Like the famous bridge or the infamous sister of Marge Simpson?) So I recognized my duty as compiler of monster mashes and watched it out of the corner of one eye.

I will say WITCHMAS is ideal if one just wants noises and images playing in the background, because it's so under-animated that it makes Hanna-Barbera look like Warner Brothers. Witch Selma takes a page from Jack Skellington and plots to overthrow the holidy of Christmas so that she can make it over in the image of Halloween. There's zero story sense and zero characterization, but the copy was correct; Selma does attempt to enlist various monsters into her scheme, including some gnomes (one strangely named Candycane), a very thin mummy, a zombie, and a very short Dracula. None of them do anything but deliver a few lines, but yes, WITCHMAS counts as a monster-mashup.  The main characters are a bunch of Santa-elves who wander around blathering about stopping Selma but doing almost nothing until the "climax," in which one elf talks Selma out of her plan. (?) 

The only thing close to a witty line appears when the zombie complains that his type of monster is too much in demand these days. But even then the incompetent writers miss the chance to have his cohort the mummy make some envious remark. I think the elves appeared in other original films from the same studio but I couldn't sustain any interest in any part of this folderol.


No comments:

Post a Comment