HAPPILY N'EVER AFTER 2 (2009)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *fair*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *comedy*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *psychological, sociological*

This silly sequel to an equally silly first film has a furshlugginer long subtitle that I'm not about to bother typing out. In my review of that film, which centered around the travails of Cinderella trying to find Mister Right, I noted that the movie was using a setup not unlike that of the SHREK films, though with the odd touch that in "Fairy Tale Land," the established events kept repeating themselves over and over until the villain interfered with the status quo. N'EVER 2 doesn't bother with that lame idea, but it suffers from the same lack of humor and good character design. In addition, no big-name voice actors appeared in this sequel, though I don't know that any stars would have improved things. However, one thing was a minor improvement: this time the fairy-tale heroine (Snow White, voiced by Helen Niedwick) does have a little potential at the start. 

As a child, Little Snow knows the entire fairy-tale kingdom loves her royal mother Grace and her middle-aged father (who's billed only as "King Cole," with no mention of the "Old" qualifier). Then Queen Grace passes away when Snow is still small. Years later, unlike the majority of Disney princesses, Teenaged Snow doesn't spend the rest of her life wanting to be a do-gooder. She's too busy being a teen queen and a trendsetter, hanging out at clubs with her similarly aged homegirls, Riding Hood, Bo Peep and Goldilocks. So for once, it's Snow's behavior that leads to her dad seeking re-marriage, as guidance for his unruly daughter.

Enter the homely Lady Vain and her equally unappealing daughter (though the daughter vanishes from the latter half of N'EVER 2). Vain uses the sorcery of a magic mirror to make herself look roughly like the late Queen Grace, beguiling Cole into becoming engaged to her. This slightly unlikable stepmother doesn't seek to have her stepdaughter killed, though. She gives Snow a magic apple that makes her blurt out nasty things about everyone in the kingdom, including her BFFs. I rather like her suffering "death by social media cancellation."

So the aggrieved Snow flees to the forest and finds her way to the home of the Seven Dwarves. The little guys not only teach Snow a good work ethic, they also instill in her the sincere desire to help people. Did I mention that back at her court, Snow had a thing for a young commoner who didn't like her conceited ways? Well, after Snow's learned the error of her ways, Handsome Commoner Guy calls her back to the kingdom and prevents the wedding of Cole and Vain. This of course presages Snow's own happy nuptials with Commoner Guy. Since Vain hasn't really committed any major crimes, she even gets a measure of forgiveness.

N'EVER 2 is a slight improvement over the first film. But like the first one, it's still not funny, nor attractive to the eye, while most of the fairy-tale cameos-- Humpty Dumpty, the Three Little Pigs, and Rumpelstiltskin (making a return from the first movie) -- are completely forgettable.  

 

AQUAMAN (2006)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *fair*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *cosmological, psychological*

I don't know which of the many reboots of the AQUAMAN comics-franchise influenced this unsuccessful pilot for a WB teleseries, but it follows many of the same beats as the popular 2018 feature film. Again we see the hero first as a small child, living amidst surface-dwelling humans with his mother and father, only to have his mother stolen from him by mysterious sea-dwellers. Then, after growing to adulthood with his father as confidante, the hero learns that his mother was a native of sunken Atlantis, and that the Atlanteans are coming back to give him grief. The pilot's biggest change from that template is that this version of Arthur "Aquaman" Curry (Justin Hartley) isn't the product of a mer-woman and a surface-dweller; Arthur's paternal unit adopts Little Arthur and marries his mother after finding them drifting in the ocean.

It's not clear, within the limits of a forty-minute pilot, why Atlanteans start messing in Mature Arthur's life after leaving him alone for roughly fifteen years, but there are both good water-breathers (Ving Rhames) and bad ones called "sirens" who can morph into claw-handed demons (Adrianne Palicki). But the script, by SMALLVILLE's showrunners Michael Millar and Alfred Gough, certainly piles on lots of subplots for development in the ongoing series that didn't happen. Arthur and his dad live in the Florida Keys, just a stone's throw from the mysterious Bermuda Triangle, somehow tied into the underwater city of Atlantis (never seen). There's a government agent investigating the recrudescence of Atlanteans, and a female Navy pilot who ends up "racing" her plane against Arthur, swimming below her in the sea like a human torpedo. A Navy man is found sixty years after he disappeared, but he hasn't aged-- though he doesn't get any older, thanks to an Atlantean assassin. Arthur barely has time to suss out any of these impending plot-threads, but he does get to slay the evil siren who maybe kidnapped his mother. 

In addition to some engaging plotlines, the pilot provided a few nice visual moments showing the wonders of the ocean, albeit on a TV budget. Probably this would have made a good show, certainly better than many of the abortions brought into imperfect life after the WB channel merged with the UPN and begot the horror that was the CW.

EDGE OF TOMORROW (2014)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *fair*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *cosmological, sociological*

Aside from sporting a name that sounds like a sixties soap opera, EDGE OF TOMORROW is a decent adaptation of the Japanese light novel ALL YOU NEED IS KILL, by Hiroshi Sakurazaka. I read KILL five or six years ago, and I remember only two items. The novel concerned (1) a human soldier who was projected into a recurring time loop thanks to accidental contact with a "Mimic," one of the inhuman creatures who've invaded Earth, and (2) the time loops allowed the hero to master a particular martial skill by dint of multiple repetitions, which was loosely compared to the way samurais practice their sword-swings over and over to attain superiority.

I can't speak to the characterization of the main hero, but William Cage (Tom Cruise) has a refreshingly unlikeable personality at the outset. Even though humanity is threatened with extinction by the Mimics, Cage has wangled an officer-position in the army's publicity department so that he can avoid risking his neck in combat. However, a commanding officer takes such a dislike to Cage that the officer frames Cage with desertion and rewrites his military history so that Cage is scheduled to ship out with the infantry. And Cage perish in combat-- except, as noted above, he's exposed to the blood of a particular type of Mimic. He then gets a temporal reprieve from his own death, for he's absorbed the Mimic's unique ability to reboot its own timeline. From then on, every time Cage is killed, under any circumstances, he simply shifts back to the point when he was inducted into the infantry. This allows him all the time he needs to self-train, so that he remembers all of the experiences in his previous "lives." More importantly, he realizes he's not the only human who went through this experience, and that the Mimics control a power that will inevitably doom humanity.

For the film's first hour or so, the script shows great facility with the permutations of the hero's "Groundhog Day" predicament, challenging the viewer to guess how Cage will find some way to master his situation. As in the novel, Cage learns that a famous fighter of the resistance, Rita Vrataski (Emily Blunt), went through a similar experience, but lost her time-shifting ability over time. Rita also gives Cage the benefit of her combat experience, with the unusual habit of temporarily "killing" Cage whenever he's too incapacitated to continue fighting, so that he'll reboot again and compensate for past failures.

EDGE is largely a two-character film, and Blunt does her best to play off Cage as he develops greater altruism, while still keeping his breezy charm. Still, EDGE is structured mostly as a star turn for Tom Cruise, and it does that reasonably well. Still, the script begins to run out of steam in the last half hour, despite continuing to throw new developments at the viewer. EDGE is a solid piece of craftsmanship, and made good box office thanks to the Cruise name, but having watched it twice, I doubt I'll ever do so again.

 

ALADDIN (1992)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *fair*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *comedy*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *psychological, sociological*

In some retellings of the Aladdin story, the protagonist is incredulous when he's sent into a room full of treasure (what the Disney ALADDIN script calls "the Cave of Wonders") and is instructed to bring back only a plain old lamp. 

I feel similarly nonplussed at the way the Disney ALADDIN swipes bits and pieces from the 1940 THIEF OF BAGHDAD, a copyrighted film released by United Artists, particularly since Disney is so litigious about anyone emulating any of their copyrighted works. But along with that puzzlement comes relief. All the things the Disney writers swiped were piddling oddments-- a sultan who likes to play with toys, a villain named Jafar (albeit with the spelling changed), and a hero's buddy named Abu (albeit changed from a human to a monkey). These elements in THIEF have great roles to play in the entire story, which I consider not just one of the great fantasy-films, but one of the great films of all time. But what Disney does with these elements is to change them into minor curiosities in a script with only modest ambitions. To mix metaphors a bit, it's as if someone stole a heap of gold from a treasure-room, but in the act of stealing it, changed it into a small pile of tin.

(Hmm, without getting into all the controversies that the opponents of "Orientalism" raised about this 1992 film-- how'd they miss that the scripters took a name that was originally applied to a Character of Color, played by an Actor of Color, and used the same name for a monkey?)

All that said, ALADDIN has its virtues. I'd like to think that the bravura opening isn't a swipe. In said opening, villainous Jafar tries to get the genie-bearing lamp from a Cave of Wonders that manifests as the head of a giant lion made of sand. In a movie brimming with nonsense-fantasy jokes, mostly stemming from a genie versed in Anachronism 101, the lion-headed treasure-cave is one of the few times ALADDIN tries to sell the viewer on pure wonder, the sort of fabulous strangeness that made Enlightenment Europe go nutty for the Thousand Nights and a Night. 

The rest of the movie is a cute love story with engaging doggerel-songs, fair action-scenes, and lots of zany comedy. This Aladdin, if he was at all borrowed from any THIEF-movie, is closest to the gamboling Douglas Fairbanks Sr from 1924, at least in terms of wanting to tweak the nose of authority. Disney-Aladdin is also a thief, but like Abu from 1940, he's willing to share his booty with those less well off than he is. Still, his yearning for better things takes us back to Fairbanks, who's redeemed from his lowly status by falling in love with High Society. His beloved from the good side of the tracks, Princess Jasmine, is more one-note, but then, most Arabian Nights princesses are not much better.

One interesting thing about the meet-cure of Aladdin and Jasmine-- who meet while Jasmine is going about incognito, not unlike the historical Haroun al-Rashid-- is that Aladdin defends her when she, like he, unthinkingly shares someone else's possessions with the less fortunate. Aladdin saves the princess with his fast-talking street-smarts, but later, once he's got hold of the genie, he wants to remake himself into his idea of an Ideal Man for the High-Society Set. So in a sense he's still running a con of sorts, and he has to learn the lesson that Honesty is the Best Policy, particularly in romance. 

I appreciate some of the script's verisimilitude-details. Unlike some of the original retellings of the tale, Jafar can only get the lamp if he uses a pawn with a particular strength of character, so that his selection of Aladdin is pretty well motivated. Jafar's ideal of marrying Jasmine to gain the throne comes out of left field, but I'm certainly glad the script didn't impute real romantic feeling to this very flat villain, in contrast to the "real" 1940 Jaffar. And there's good byplay between the evil vizier and his hench-parrot Iago, voiced by the inimitable Gilbert Gottfried.

I can't say the same for the "good" support-characters. A little of the monkey Abu went a long way, and when the film also introduced a sentient flying carpet, a tiger, and (late in the game) an elephant, I felt I was drowning in sidekick-schtick. Robin Williams' Genie of the Lamp is a slightly different kettle of fish. He's not only the source of most of the manic humor; he's also the dopey friend who sometimes says wise things, and so he's more crucial to the Reformation of Aladdin. I could have lived without the B-plot of Aladdin promising to release Genie from bondage, though.

ALADDIN was a feel-good success, spawning two sequels and a TV show, so in a sense it's somewhat immune to criticism. But just for the accomplishment of translating the appeal of Robin Williams into animation, I'd give it high marks in the realm of fantasy-comedies.  

DEMON PRINCE ENMA (2006)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *drama*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *metaphysical, psychological*

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS

Given that the 1973 anime adaptation of Go Nagai's same-year manga DEMON PRINCE ENMA is not available to me, I'm glad that the first Enma-emulation I stumbled across was 2011's GHASTLY PRINCE ENMA, BURNING UP. This anime was not only a good condensation of Nagai's rollicking manga, it even improved on the manga-artist's wandering plotlines. 

This four-part OVA series, directed by one Mamoru Kanbe, predated GHASTLY by five years, and purported to adapt Nagai's 2006 sequel-manga of the same name. The 1973 manga followed the adventures of four heroic demons seeking to return fugitive demons to hell, and the two humanoid protagonists, Enma and Yuki, are roughly in their teen years. (In the manga and the 2011 anime, Enma is drawn as if he were ten years old, but from his heady sex drive I assume that the character was probably at least fifteen but drawn in the "super deformed" manner.) 

But there was some difficulty in adapting the 2006 manga, in that Nagai only completed two installments. (There's a sequel to that series as well, but it's not by Nagai.) In the 2006 manga and anime, Enma and Yuki are now fully matured demons, and they pretend to be human "occult detectives" in order to track down and neutralize yet more demonic escapees. Possibly Nagai lost interest in the series or found some other series more engaging. The above illustration shows, though, that he didn't spare the raunch-power in his two episodes.

Kanbe's OVA series is completely different in tone. It keeps the base premise, of a supernatural detective agency run by Enma, Yuki, and their two nonhuman assistants, Kapaeru the water-demon and Chapeauji the talking hat. Kanbe's four stories concentrate largely on the sufferings of those afflicted by demonic possession, with little in the way of the action-sequences Nagai favored. In the first two episodes, Kanbe throws in a few sex-comedy sequences-- Enma ogles Yuki when her breasts get exposed, Yuki retaliates by freezing the demon prince in ice. But in the final two-part episode, the entire story is a downer. Yuki is possessed by one of the demons the team sought to exile, Kapaeru is killed, and though Enma saves Yuki and destroys her possessing spirit, the main human victim dies anyway. The demon-destroying scenes just barely edge into the sphere of the combative, and that's because Kanbe's main emphasis in all four episodes focuses upon the travails of afflicted people.

Only the first episode provides decent drama. In "Nobusama," a father, Heinrich, appeals to the Enma detective agency to find out if his daughter Lola is some sort of vampire, since various persons who were in Lola's company suffered violent deaths. The demon-detectives find out that a possessing spirit killed the innocents, but the evil spirit is in Heinrich. Yuki determines that Heinrich nurtured a jealousy of anyone else being near his daughter, even though consciously he was revulsed by his own feelings for her. This tragic denouement aside, the rest of the episodes, in contrast, are just standard creepy stuff. There's nothing intrinsically wrong with an adapter going his own way, as long as he produces something heartfelt. But someone wanting good Japanese horror would probably better off looking off for a less compromised OVA series.

GEORGE AND THE DRAGON (2004)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *fair*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *cosmological, sociological*

Though it's rare that I find much if any merit in movies I originally disliked, GEORGE AND THE DRAGON proves one of the exceptions.

On first viewing, possibly ten years or more ago, I thought GEORGE's tongue-in-cheek humor tiresome and its editing sloppy. (There's an early scene in which the toughgirl princess defeats three bandits, either killing them or knocking them out, and the fallen men simply disappear from the next wide shot showing what the princess does next.) And yet, if I judge this flick-- very nearly the only production credited to director/co-writer Tom Reeve-- next to the many films that weren't able to even get across a simple bit of formulaic entertainment, GEORGE comes off as at least a pleasant diversion. Its worst offense is probably referencing the medieval legend of dragon-slaying Saint George, since the movie is really just a generic sendup of dragon-slaying narratives.

George (James Purefoy) returns to Europe from the Holy Wars, intending to settle down in his native England. He brings along a Moorish buddy, Tarik (Michael Clarke Duncan), but after a little comic byplay, they part ways because Tarik wants to go outlaw-hunting. Back in England, George reunites with his aged father. Dad's happy to see Sonny back alive, but for reason unexplained he also has a real jones for his offspring to become a great dragon-slayer. No one's seen a dragon in England for a long time, but George's father insists that when George goes to petition the king for a plot of land, he should take along a dragon-summoning horn, just in case he gets the chance to call a dragon to fight.

The king has his own problems, for his daughter Lunna (Piper Perabo) has disappeared. A lordling named Garth (Patrick Swayze) offers to seek her out in the hope of winning her hand, and her claim to the throne, but George is willing to play retriever just for some farmland. 

George finds Lunna first, and discovers her secret: she's guarding the huge, unhatched egg of a dragon in a nearby cave. After the two of them "meet violent"-- Lunna clubs George when he makes an attempt to smash the egg-- Lunna explains that she befriended the mother dragon, before it flew off and disappeared, possibly having been killed by someone. Now Lunna will do anything to protect the infant dragon, and George's best chance to get what he wants is to abet her zany scheme.

Cutting through a lot of incidentals, George finds himself obliged to contend with Garth and his men, that same group of bandits Tarik went to find, and the mother dragon itself. In fact, George is able to use the dragon horn to summon the mama dragon at a propitious moment, so if anyone wondered earlier about the usefulness of that plot-point, that's the reason for its existence. In essence, beyond the side-plot of belligerent lovers realizing their romantic inclinations, GEORGE is a conservationist's wet-dream. The only dragons seen are the mother and its child when it hatches, and since they don't fly or spit fire, the broad implication is that they're just big animals who have been hunted to extinction. The story doesn't establish whether or not the species used to prey on human beings-- though Mama Dragon does devour a bad guy at just the right moment-- and so the script isn't entirely honest in setting up its moral dilemma.

I still found some of the humor dopey, but other moments worked okay, mostly because James Purefoy invests his simple character with a ton of conviction. Perabo and Duncan are adequate, but that's still better than Swayze, who always looks like he's sucking on lemons. Fight-scenes are competent but nothing special. GEORGE can't be regarded as any sort of Quixote-esque satire of either archaic dragon-slaying myths or their pop-fiction equivalents; it's too derivative for that. But at least its modern sentiments help it stand out from the crowd of low-budget knight-flicks. 

 

THE MOST DANGEROUS MAN ALIVE (1961)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *fair*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *drama*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *cosmological, sociological*

Though I saw most of the sci-fi flicks of the fifties and sixties on commercial TV, I only came across a YouTube copy of this item recently. ALIVE is one of many movies on the theme of "mad science transforms ordinary man into superhuman." Like THE AMAZING COLOSSAL MAN, main character Eddie Candell is transformed by accidental exposure to an atomic test.

Eddie's a gangster of indeterminate history, but he's sent to prison for a murder he didn't commit by mob-boss Damon (Anthony Caruso). His former girlfriend Linda (Debra Paget) ends up in Damon's bed, but another woman, Carla (Elaine Stewart), genuinely loves Eddie and waits for him while he's in prison. Hungry for vengeance, Eddie breaks out, trespasses on the testing ground, and the atomic blast causes him to assimilate the steel molecules of a nearby tower. Eddie soon learns that he's invulnerable to gunfire, making him uniquely suited to be Damon's nemesis.

I don't recognize most of the other credits of the three credited writers, not even those of Michael Pate, best known as an actor in films like CURSE OF THE UNDEAD. Director Allan Dwan had a much longer resume of movies dating back to the silent era, but ALIVE was his last rodeo. Dwan later described this sci-fi mellerdrama as an unpleasant shoot, not least because he had a meager budget and only limited sets on which to shoot. Nevertheless, ALIVE tells its simple story efficiently enough. I particularly like the scene in which a resident scientific expert explains Eddie's new power to some dumbfounded cops with the visual aid of a "steel watermelon," also a creation of the atomic blast.

Said scientist is given some nice gravitas by Tudor Owen, and Stewart emotes nicely as the lovelorn Carla. Paget and Caruso just deliver their lines reasonably well, and Caruso has a nice moment directing his hoods to spring an electrical trap on Eddie. But Ron Randell provides the linchpin in terms of acting, and though the script isn't anything special, he put a lot of intensity into his character of a shady guy motivated almost entirely by vengeance. He's compelling enough that, even though the pursuing cops do the right thing in hunting him down, he retains the better part of the viewer's sympathy when he's finally destroyed. Dwan might not have liked ALIVE, but other directors have ended their careers on much worse movies.

LEGO DC SUPER HEROES: THE FLASH (2018)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *comedy*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *metaphysical*

As I may be the world's greatest despiser of JUSTICE LEAGUE: THE FLASHPOINT PARADOX-- and not much more sanguine about the comic-book plot that birthed it-- I may not be the best audience for even a Lego Flash flick with a time-travel theme. Obviously, this production is not burdened with pretentious doom-and-gloom, since all the Lego movies keep things light. But still, for me The Flash works best having contemporary adventures against evil aliens and dastardly super-villains, not messing around with time-paradoxes.

Though this movie doesn't sport the "Justice League" banner, much of the story revolves around Flash's place in the League. The short version: Professor Zoom, an evildoer from Earth's far future, forms a massive hate for 20th-century super-speedster The Flash, and devotes his life to ruining the hero's life. The first part of Zoom's plan involves subjecting Flash to a series of "deja vu" experiences, and later he takes over Flash's role as Earth's favorite speed-hero, as well as making the rest of the Justice League look bad. 

As is often the case with the Lego movies, the main plot is fleshed out with one or more subplots. Here, one involves the induction of the size-altering Atom into the League, and in deference to his debut here, he gets a fair-sized amount of attention (such as his shrinking down to atom-size to change the makeup of the Joker's laughing gas). In addition, there's a pointless interpolation of a "League of Super-Pets," consisting mostly of Superman's Krypto, Batman's Bat-Hound, and Aquaman's sea-horse Storm. 

A tangential plotline involves Flash solving his problems by appealing to two of DC's wizard-types, Doctor Fate (given a voice like Berry Gordy for some reason) and Zatanna. They tell Flash that he was given his power by "The Speed Force," as if it were some metaphysical entity. That may well be current DC canon, but this sort of notion is a little abstruse for a comedy-oriented cartoon.

LEGO FLASH is fairly ordinary of its type; not too good, not too bad, not too-- FLASH-y.

CANARY BLACK (2024)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *fair*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *cosmological, sociological*

Despite sporting a name that sounds similar to a DC Comics heroine, the name "Canary Black" refers to a computer file, and the heroine seeking to obtain said file is kickass intelligence agent Avery Graves (Kate Beckinsale).

This is a fast-paced thrill-ride of the movie with some slight sociological myth-content. Immediately after completing an assignment for her agency, one that proves how kickass she is, Avery's husband David is kidnapped by schemers unknown. To recover his living body, she must betray her agency and hand over the file to the blackmailers,

Up to the 60-minute mark, CANARY seems like any decent action-espionage flick, not unlike a lot of the 1990s output from NuImage. However, the script takes a turn into science-fiction with the revelation that the file is actually a viral bomb, capable of shutting down the Internet in any designated country. The villain (Goran Kostic) has a speech in which he derides the U.S. for having invented the virus as a weapon against computer hacking, but by any other name, he's still a black-hearted evildoer. Indeed, once he's got the virus, he beams a blackmail message to the UN while he wears a concealing black helmet. So we're not that far from the world of superheroes, after all.

Beckinsale's character is simple but evocative, and both production values and fight-choreography prove strong. So this CANARY sings its one song pretty well. 

LEGO DC SUPER HEROES: JUSTICE LEAGUE-- ATTACK OF THE LEGION OF DOOM (2015)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *fair*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *comedy*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *psychological*

In marked contrast to the same year's BIZARRO LEAGUE Lego-flick, the Legoverse's first introduction of the Legion of Doom (as conceived by the SUPERFRIENDS cartoon of the 1970s) is a good parody of a "straight" Justice League story with several funny moments-- though at least one joke involving "the New 52" will only make sense to comics insiders.

I don't remember what if any status "Lego Cyborg" had in earlier installments, but here he's the new kid in the League, and eager to prove himself. Meanwhile, Lex Luthor, having suffered more humiliating defeats since the League came into existence, decides to forge his Legion of Doom. After a pretty funny "obstacle course" to determine which villains get to join, Luthor's lineup includes Gorilla Grodd, The Cheetah, Captain Cold, Sinestro, and Black Manta. Three Bat-foes are rejected for one reason or another-- The Joker, The Penguin and The Man-Bat. Also, a Flash-villain, The Trickster, has a separate encounter with the League, which is mainly worth mentioning because he's voiced by Mark Hamill, who portrayed a live-action version of the evildoer on the 1990 FLASH show. Trickster's main function in the script is to unleash a trick that Cyborg falls for, thus making him look bad in front of his buddies.

Luthor's first mission for the Legion is to raid a government facility, and despite their being forced to flee the League, the villains escape with an alien who was being held prisoner in the facility. (This prisoner is alluded to in BIZARRO's coda, though the actual continuity doesn't track.) Irritated by his internment, the alien decided to help the Legion, but only because Luthor claims that the Legion is devoted to justice. I don't know Luthor knew that this ET had powers that could help the Legion's next scheme-- getting the League exiled from Earth-- but I can give the writers a pass, given that this is a good intro for the Lego version of The Martian Manhunter.

There's a running gag in which Flash and Green Lantern keep trying to one-up each other, and a subplot showing that Darkseid has been funneling weapons to Luthor. After the Legion's defeat, Darkseid contacts a new potential ally, doubtlessly Brainiac, who then appears in COSMIC CLASH. To date CLASH is the last of the Lego-flicks to sport the "Justice League" banner, though technically two later movies, spotlighting the Flash and Aquaman, make considerable use of the League's presence. The fight-scenes combine a decent mix of comedy and adventure, and in the end, Cyborg gets to have his day in the sun. Thus DOOM stacks up as one of the more entertaining of the series.

LEGO DC SUPER HEROES: JUSTICE LEAGUE VS BIZARRO LEAGUE (2015)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *comedy*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *psychological*

Given that all of the Lego versions of standard DC heroes are goofy (some would say "bizarre") takes on said characters, there's not a lot of ground to be gained by creating Bizarros of the Justice League.

The one exception to this statement is that in the opening scenes, the script does get across one psychological trope with regard to the Man of Steel. When Bizarro-Superman shows up in Metropolis and begins wreaking havoc with his blunders, Superman is embarrassed that the locals think the Moron of Steel is somehow related to him. Thus, when the hero finds a way to distract Bizarro by sending him to another planet, Superman's not doing it purely to protect humanity, but to sweep a mortifying subject under the rug.

The script then burns up a little time having the Lego League contend with four Lego-villains, giving the movie the chance to introduce its cubical versions of Guy Gardner ("alternate Green Lantern") and Plastic Man (probably not the best choice of a hero to be Lego-ized).  

Shortly thereafter, Bizarro returns to Earth and invades Luthor's laboratory, stealing his duplicator ray. When members of the League follow, Bizarro uses the duplicator ray to create Bizarro versions of Batman, Guy Gardner, Wonder Woman, and Cyborg, whom he then takes back to his newly adopted "Bizarro World." When the heroes follow, they learn that the world to which Superman exiled Bizarro is now under attack by the forces of Darkseid. After various reversals, the League repulses Darkseid, saving both Earth and Bizarro World.

There's one good fan-pleasing moment: Superman's body gets riddled by kryptonite radiation, but Bizarro, invulnerable to that influence because he's artificial, dispels the poison with his super-breath. But the rest of the film lacks the comic timing found in the better Lego-DC outings. 

There's a coda that foreshadows events of the same year's LEGION OF DOOM effort, though the coda itself doesn't blend in with the continuity of that story.

GHASTLY PRINCE ENMA, BURNING UP! (2011)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *good*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *comedy*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *metaphysical*

*SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS*

I hadn't heard of Go Nagai's manga "Dororon Enma-kun" or any of its reboots until stumbling across this subtitled 2011 series on streaming, mostly derived from the 1973 original. Since most of the other Nagai works I'd encountered didn't seem as well-organized as GHASTLY, I read the '73 manga online, only to find that it was like a lot of other Nagai productions. tons of transgressive scenes of sex and violence, with an insubstantial plot that pooped out at the conclusion. Therefore I credit the writer-director of the anime series, Yoshitano Yonetari, with having firmed up the weaker aspects of the source material.

Nagai still deserves high marks for the inventiveness of the basic scenario. In the Hell of Japanese belief, the ruler King Enma becomes irate that certain demons have escaped his domain to wreak havoc on humanity. Caring more about his proprietary rights over his subjects than about human suffering, the monarch assigns his nephew Prince Enma to corral the escapees. To this end the king gives Enma a fire-staff weapon and three helpers. Two are just minor figures, a kappa-spirit named Kapeuru and a living hat named Chapeujie, while the third is a powerful snow-woman, Princess Yuki. Enma and Yuki have a thing for one another, though Yuki plays hard to get while Enma is an unswerving perv, always ready to peep on her or feel her up. (The Yuki of the original manga is not nearly as forceful as the one in the 2011 anime, since 2011 Enma frequently gets his ass kicked for his molestations.)

The early episodes are very "monster-of-the-week," as the four-person "Demon Squad" begins the task of tracking down various vicious demons. In the manga they get aid from a human boy, but in Yonetani their aide is a human girl, Harumi, who's frequently grossed out by the licentiousness and irresponsibility of these "good demons." Many of the fugitive demons also inflict absurd curses on humanity, like making them unable to stay on the feet, or causing a "fattitude plague" in which almost everyone on Earth becomes fat enough to roll along like a beachball. 

One structuring addition by Yonetari is that he interpolates a character from one of the ENMA reboots, one who was originally a female version of Enma named Enpi. In the manga Enpi was much like another Enma character, Kekko Kamen, who went around semi-naked most of the time. Yonetani makes Enpi a separate character, the older sister of Enma, and gives her a quixotic mission. Enpi constantly undermines the Demon Squad's efforts because she wants to make the whole world "overflow with titillation and delight."

Another added wrinkle is that 2011 Enma, unlike the 1973 version, wears a piece of metal headgear called a "Fire Crown." A number of demons want to remove the crown for whatever reason. Enma doesn't remember the crown's purpose, except that his vanished mother and father gave it to him, but of course he's willing to burn to ashes anyone who tries to take his things.

The third and last improvement is that, while the manga-version of King Enma has no big plot in mind when the series commences, Yonetani's version is working hand in glove with the denizens of Heaven. Both parties need to power their realms with "psychowatts" derived from human beings, and the easiest way to gain that power is to bring about a major cataclysm that ends most of human life. This sort of chaotic apocalypse occurs in a lot of Nagai manga, though it's only suggested at the end of "Demon Prince Enma."

Yonetani manages to tie together Enpi, the Crown and the collaboration of Heaven and Hell in a pleasing way. Enpi eventually reveals that the siblings' parents created the crown to control Enma's lusfulness, which had become so pronounced that he apparently tried to sex up his sister. It's not clear why Enpi became more oriented on promoting disorder later on. Still, she's instrumental to showing how Enma can unleash the power of lust to rebound upon both angels and demons. Instead of bringing about humanity's destruction, the denizens of Heaven and Hell become so horny that they have a mass orgy. As it happens, the orgy unleashes so much energy that Heaven and Hell no longer need to kill people to get psychowatts for their realms, and so humanity gets to live.

So Yonetani succeeds in making all of the grossness and weirdness of the series' twelve episodes work together coherently, as well as giving the viewer all of Nagai's characteristic sex and violence. (At times the two get combined: in two separate episodes, the boobs of female characters become so large that they can be used as bludgeons.) All of this wackiness is given a serious undercurrent by the end theme song, which starts off singing, "Sooner or later, everybody's gotta die," but concludes with the life-affirming "We are still alive!"

  

DEATHSTROKE KNIGHTS AND DRAGONS (2020)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *psychological*

I could have copied for my illustration one of DEATHSTROKE's more violent scenes, but instead I chose this talking-head shot, to clarify how bland the animation style is when no one's being shot or stabbed. Possibly his blandness has something to do with the DTV's origins as a web-series prepared for a subdivision of the CW company.

I can't fault the script of Marc de Matteis in finding the most efficient way to boil down the relevant elements of the Deathstroke property so as to exclude his origins in the TEEN TITANS book. KNIGHTS contains most of the characters germane to the cosmos of Slade Wilson, a.k.a. the masked mercenary of the title: his estranged wife (and former combat-veteran) Adeline, his son Joseph, his daughter (by another mother) Rose, and his assistant Wintergreen. In the comics Deathstroke works for the criminal cabal H.I.V.E. rather than fighting against them-- at least in early narratives-- but since KNIGHTS is in effect independent of DC continuity, this change is not important. De Matteis creates a new villain (as far as I know) named the Jackal who's one of Deathstroke's opponents, and he throws in a couple of stooges who are funhouse-mirror versions of their DC-counterparts, Lady Shiva and The Bronze Tiger.

The big problem is that the film-script emulates Marv Wolfman's Deathstroke-of-the-comics far too well-- which may be a selling point for some viewers, but which was a turnoff for me. In the comics Deathstroke originated as a TITANS villain in his early-1980s appearance, though he enjoyed a starring DC series from 1991 to 1996. Conceptually the character followed closely in the footsteps of hyperviolent crusaders like Wolverine and Punisher, in being utterly unrestrained in terms of striking his enemies with unrestrained violence. This approach would not have been extraordinary if Deathstroke had remained an unregenerate evildoer. However, even in the mercenary's first appearance, Marv Wolfman sent mixed signals. Deathstroke was merciless, and yet he possessed some vague nobility. He was a mercenary who killed people for pay, but he had some code of professionalism that supposedly distinguished him from the average assassin. 

These mixed signals, Marc de Matteis produces impeccably for KNIGHTS-- but they don't make Deathstroke as compelling a character as either Wolverine or Punisher at their respective bests. Slade Wilson becomes the costumed Deathstroke as the result of a military experiment, and he uses the powers he gained from the experiment-- rapid healing, super-fast reflexes-- to become a mercenary. At the same time that he's a ruthless mercenary, he's also a family man, marrying Adeline and spawning young Joseph-- though during some foreign-based adventure, he also sleeps with another woman, who gives birth to an older female, Rose. These movie-characters have next to nothing in common with the comics-originals, for their purpose is the same as Adeline's here: to give Slade Wilson grief for his past sins. Yet the script is spongy on the subject of what those sins were, aside from sleeping around.

KNIGHTS tries to make Deathstroke sympathetic in that in one exploit, he's seen confronting one of his targets, but informs the guy that he's just killed the man who ordered the target's death and now demands that the target pay Deathstroke for the hit. This is meant to suggest that Deathstroke somehow manages to make his murders serve an altruistic purpose. Frankly, this is so phony that when The Jackal takes the contrary position in one monologue-- to the effect that there's no real meaning in violence beyond the acquisition of power-- the villain sounds more authentic than the hero ever does.

The characterizations of the supporting characters are no better; they come on stage, air their grievances, and press their attacks on long-suffering Deathstroke. There's a lot of competently executed violence, but without a protagonist whose violent obsession feels roughly justified-- again, paging the Punisher-- the violence alone is likely to make some viewers want to go watch a PUNISHER movie instead. 

  

TEEN TITANS: TROUBLE IN TOKYO (2006)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *fair*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *psychological, sociological*

This TV-film aired on Cartoon Network in the same year that the five-season TEEN TITANS teleseries concluded. That circumstance probably encouraged some reviewers to term TROUBLE IN TOKYO a "finale." But because the TV show was in the nature of a continuing soap opera-- though not as much as the comic book from which it was derived-- this stand-alone TV-movie doesn't really play into the ongoing storylines, with one exception I'll describe later. But TROUBLE does have the virtue of being an homage to the artistic sources for the popular program.

In the Titans' home of Jump City, they're inexplicably attacked by a colorful super-powered foe, Saico-Tech. The heroes defeat their attacker, who makes confused statements in Japanese, and then disappears. So all five-- Robin, Starfire, Raven, Cyborg and Beast Boy-- journey to Tokyo to see what they can learn the entity Saico-Tech claimed to be his boss: someone named Brushogun.

Once in the Japanese capital, the Titans find themselves forced to battle a Godzilla-sized reptilian monster, though it, like Saico-Tech, disappears. The American heroes then meet a special task force, the Tokyo Troopers, who under the command of Commander Daizo are responsible for quelling any monsters or villains who menace the city. This in itself may be a subtle acknowledgement that Japanese pop culture generally seems less invested in vigilante heroes and more in crusaders linked to some authority, be it Earthly or extraterrestrial. Daizo welcomes the Titans as guest heroes but tells them that "Brushogun" is just an urban legend about a man who lost his soul.

The Titans then try to relax and enjoy touring Japan, with Beast Boy being the most insistent, wanting to visit a manga publishing company. (The fact that the heroes go to the company but find it closed should trigger one's foreshadowing-senses.) During this period, we see the only continuation of a TV-show plotline, as Robin and Starfire come close to consummating their romance. However, Robin can't let the mystery go unsolved and launches a private investigation. This action seems to conjure forth another attack on the Teen Wonder by Saico-Tech. However, during the fight Saico-Tech appears to perish, and Commander Daizo arrests Robin. Further, the other Titans are attacked by brand-new villains, some of whom look like familiar figures from anime: an Astro Boy type, a cat-girl type, etc. I won't go into a lot of detail about the nature of the entity responsible for all of the strange goings-on, but yes, there is a Brushogun, Virginia, and he too seems very like an American's attempt to create a supernatural menace of the sort the Japanese are often good art producing.

The reason I call TROUBLE an homage is because, for whatever reasons, TEEN TITANS heavily invested in visual tropes used in popular anime, particularly the use of "super-deformed" versions of the stars for comical effect. And of course, having the theme song sung in two versions-- one in English, one in Japanese-- signals an appreciation of Japanese pop culture as well. This isn't to say that the TITANS show didn't have a lot of grounding in American tropes as well. Still, I like to think that the animators wanted to conclude their time with the Titans franchise by re-iterating their admiration for the influence Japanese pop art had on them.

THE HOUSE OF USHER (1989)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *uncanny*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *drama*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *psychological*

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS

In my review of this film, I noted that it was one of three 1989 collaborations between producer Harry Alan Towers and director Alan Birkenshaw, and that two of those three were fake adaptations of Edgar Allan Poe stories. So I decided to look at HOUSE OF USHER, which slightly preceded Birkenshaw's MASQUE OF THE RED DEATH.

My re-watch confirmed that the 1989 USHER was as bad as I remembered, as well as a much worse take on Poe than MASQUE. Whereas Birkenshaw's direction on the later film is at least competent, the visuals for USHER are ugly and dispiriting, and the plot-action is just one lumbering grossout scene after the other.

The plot, such as it is, starts with an engaged couple, Ryan and Molly (Rufus Swart, Romy Windsor). They're driving through the English countryside, trying to find the castle of Ryan's uncle Roderick Usher (the same name as the protagonist of the titular Poe story). Two weird children appear in the road, and the driver has to crash the car to avoid hitting the kids-- who are not seen again until the film's end. Molly is largely unhurt, but Ryan suffers injuries. As it happens, though, the butler who works for Roderick happens to be in the area.

Molly passes out, and when she wakes up, she's at the Usher Castle. She meets Roderick (Oliver Reed), who tells her that Ryan was taken to an English hospital, but that Molly can't go visit him until he's better. Having no means of transportation, Molly accepts the situation, though the elder Usher and his servants all seem eccentric. Roughly like the Poe character, Roderick has unusually sharp senses, though the film mostly forgets about this element when it's convenient.

It takes this plodding movie forever to get to the heart of the matter: Roderick's got Ryan squirreled away in the castle, to use him as a threat against Molly. Because the Ushers suffer from a "blood taint," Roderick wants Molly to wed him so that he can produce a line of healthy children. I can't resist mentioning that this part resembles the plot of the original Gothic novel, THE CASTLE OF OTRANTO, though I doubt either the writer or director were aware of that book. I can only guess that the writer picked up on the arguable incest-elements of the original story, in which Roderick has his sister buried alive for some transgressive reason, and he reworked that into a "bad father" drama. So most of the film is about Molly trying to win free of Roderick's tyranny, like a lot of mainstream Gothics.

For good measure, halfway through the movie the audience learns that Roderick has a brother named Walter (Donald Pleasance), who's lived for years in the castle as a virtual prisoner. But Walter, who wears a drill-bit glove on one hand, may be crazier than Roderick. After a lot of blundering attempts at shock, there's a big fight between Ryan and the psycho brothers, and the house catches on fire as Roderick chases Molly--

And suddenly, with no explanation, or even a dream-transition, Molly and Ryan are back in their car, on the English highway, looking for Roderick's castle. But this time, Molly, guided by "women's intuition," suggests they drive back the way they came. As they do so, the same two kids from the opening are seen walking along the highway, but they merely watch as the car implicitly drives away from its encounter with the Gothic patriarch.

This ending is probably the most interesting thing about this dismal movie. Possibly Birkenshaw thought this "arty" touch would grab the horror-audience. I've discussed the idea of the "movie as premonitory dream" in my review of INVADERS FROM MARS. But that film plays fair in showing the viewpoint character having dreams that may or may not come true, and USHER utterly fails to understand how the dream-trope works when well done. Next to this massive misfire, MASQUE is refreshingly ordinary.

THE BRIDE WITH WHITE HAIR 2 (1993)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *fair*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *drama*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *metaphysical, psychological, sociological*

Although BRIDE 2 came out the same year as BRIDE 1, it still met the fate of many other sequels: not quite managing, even with the best efforts, to duplicate the first film's chemistry.

Now, BRIDE 1 was all about how clan-conflicts doomed the great love of two members of said clans: young swordsman Yihang of the WuDang Clan, and "wolf girl" Lien from WuShuang. Feelings of betrayal cause Lien to transform into a blood-hungry "white-haired witch" who can, among other things, strangle or stab people with her extensible hair-follicles. Most of the clans are decimated by their conflict as well, although WuShuang seems totally gone while WuDang has apparently reconstituted itself, to judge by the number of young people still amid its ranks. However, witchy Lien has built a new clan made up largely of other women betrayed by their male lovers, and with the aid of these women warriors she's continued to prey on all local clans. Apparently all this has remained the state of affairs for ten years since the first film, because Yihang waits ten years for the blooming of a magical flower that can cure Lien's madness.

However, the Lien-Yihang conflict can no longer drive the narrative, so the writers-- one of whom was BRIDE 1's director Ronny Yu-- focus upon a new couple. This time both romantic leads come from the WuDang Clan: Yu Qin (Joey Meng) and Feng (Sunny Chan). Feng is the nephew of Yihang, who to the best of everyone's knowledge is still brooding atop some snowy mountain, waiting for the blooming of the magic flower. The fact that Feng's uncle brought about much of WuDang's suffering doesn't seem to bother anyone, and everyone seems quite happy that Feng will become the new head of the clan once he's married. (To be sure, there's one female, Yu Hee, who has a thing for Feng, just as there was a side-character in BRIDE 1 who wanted to win Yihang's love-- but Yu Hee ends up supporting Feng's romance despite her own feelings.)

Lien, who's still pissed at WuDang, abducts Yu Qin but leaves Feng alive. Feng thus marshals six other stalwarts, including Yu Hee, to liberate the bride who doesn't have white hair. While they prepare for battle, the audience sees that again Lien has fallen prey to bad advice. Chen, one of the members belonging to Lien's clan of disaffected females, has conceived a lesbian passion for Lien and is jealous of Yihang when Lien remains distant. Chen persuades Lien to brainwash Yu Qin to believe herself betrayed by Feng. Thus, when the knights of WuDang attack, Yu Qin joins the other Amazons in routing her former friends. But on the good side, the magic flower has bloomed, and Yihang is at least ready to make amends for his past deeds.

The various dramatic arcs involving Feng and Yu Qin, or Lien and Chen, are not very involving, and the production values are a little less impressive this time out. I don't think new director David Wu is at fault, though, and all the actors certainly do their best. The doomed reunion of Lien and Yihang has all the expected sturm und drang one might desire of a splashy romance, and BRIDE 2 gets that across in a satisfactory fashion, though the script doesn't evince the more imaginative concepts seen in the first part.

HAUNTING FEAR (1990)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *uncanny*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *drama*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *psychological*

Leading lady Brinke Stevens has stated that she felt that her role in HAUNTING FEAR was her best performance. And she does well in the central role of a woman consumed by the Poesque fear of being buried alive-- though her sentiments might be skewed by the fact that another actress, Delia Sheppard, was relegated to perform the sex scenes for this steamy DTV production.

FEAR does look a little better than the average flick directed by Fred Olen Ray-- though since he's also the writer, no one should expect much from the script. Despite allusions to Poe's "Premature Burial," the overall structure has greater resemblance to "Fall of the House of Usher," where a woman's buried alive due to masculine interference.

Rich lady Victoria (Stevens), married to "kept husband" Terry (Jay Richardson), has had a deathly fear of premature burial since the untimely death of her father. She nurtures the unproven belief that her father's physician Carlton (Robert Clarke) conspired to use his medical knowledge to off Victoria's father. This trope, in which a woman divides paternal influence into a "good father" and a "bad father," is in the end wasted by Ray, turning out to be nothing but a lousy red herring. Husband Terry not only doesn't credence Victoria's irrational fears, he even insists that she continue seeing Carlton for medication.

Meanwhile, Terry's got a couple of skeletons in his private closet. He's racked up big gambling debts, causing a mobster (Robert Quarry) to hire a private detective (Jan-Michael Vincent) to surveil the couple's house. More importantly, Terry's banging his secretary Lisa (Sheppard) on the side, and Lisa urges Terry to off his wife so that she Lisa can take over.

There's some time-wasting folderol in which a psychiatrist (top billed Karen Black) uses hypnotic regression to solve Victoria's obsession. Victoria supposedly imagines that in a past life she was raped by her husband's brother, though nothing in the narrative validates this vision. In any case, Terry and Lisa finally get down to brass tacks, consigning Victoria to a coffin, hoping she'll perish of a "natural" heart attack. Instead, what doesn't kill Victoria makes her stronger, and like Madeleine from HOUSE OF USHER, she inexplicably breaks out of the coffin and wreaks bloody vengeance on her would-be killers. Just to give Vincent something to do, he tries to capture Victoria and gets cut up a bit, after which she simply escapes, possibly in a riff on HALLOWEEN's ending.

Like a lot of Ray movies, the story's just an excuse to let his stock company players strut their stuff, some with very small roles, like Hoke Howell and Michael Berryman. But there's enough gratuitous sex and gore to keep things from getting too dull. 

THE MASQUE OF THE RED DEATH (1989)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *uncanny*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *drama*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *psychological*

*SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS*

Though this MASQUE is yet another "phony Poe" movie that captures nothing of the writer's unique appeal, it's certainly the best of the three films British producer Harry Alan Towers made with American journeyman director Alan Birkenshaw circa 1989. In fact, this movie shares with 1989's TEN LITTLE INDIANS the same top-billed stars-- Frank Stallone, Brenda Vaccaro, and Herbert Lom-- as well as having been shot mostly in South Africa. (I assume the exteriors showing a Bavarian castle were put together thanks to Towers' legendary European connections.) Stallone and Vaccaro definitely don't deserve their top billing in MASQUE, and though Lom's role is more substantial, viewpoint character Rebecca, played by Michelle McBride, provides the heavy lifting here. In addition, the real star of the show is MASQUE's psycho-killer, and though she doesn't have very good motivations at least she racks up a pretty strong body count.

Rebecca journeys to the Bavarian castle of a famous rich guy, Ludwing (Lom). He's holding a lavish costume party for his many acquaintances and hangers-on, and one of those guests is soap-opera actress Elena (Vaccaro). Rebecca, in line with her profession as a photographer-paparazzi, hopes to get some sensational photos of the aging soap-queen, though the only thing Elena does at the bash is to canoodle with some much younger men. I assume that the part of Elena was concocted to give Vaccaro a role, since it would have made more sense had Rebecca been focused on the mysterious Ludwig. In any case, she counterfeits an invitation to the party and dons a Cupid-costume, all the better to conceal a camera in her bow. 

Some reviews call this a "slasher." But since the victims are brought together because of the partygoers' indebtedness to wealthy Ludwig, the movie has more structural resemblance to "mystery killer" films, ranging from the "old dark house" flicks of the thirties to the aforementioned TEN LITTLE INDIANS book/play by Agatha Christie. MASQUE does have a killer dressed up in a costume like that of Poe's Red Death, but one can find cloaked murderers in the 1930s as well as in the 1980s-- though the level of violence here is definitely post-slasher. This "Red Death" does want to wipe out all of the partygoers, which is about the only element the movie has in common with the Poe story. Since writer Michael Murray had also worked on the other Towers-Birkenshaw collab of 1989, THE HOUSE OF USHER, he apparently decided to up the Poesque elements by having one victim killed by a knife-edged pendulum.

It takes a while for Ludwig and his guests to twig to the fact that some of the attendees are being murdered (including early fatality Elena), and when they do, the film faces the usual problems of the "old dark house" plot: "how do you keep the pool of victims available for further murders?" Ludwig, who's fixated on keeping his guests together as his extended family, uses mechanical gates to keep everyone confined to the castle, though clearly, it's the script that keeps the panicky guests from escaping by other means. Ludwig is never a serious contender for the Big Reveal, and indeed he's slain by the serial slayer.

The writer doesn't bother with leaving clues to the mystery killer's ID; after a half dozen partygoers are slain, an airheaded actress named Collette (Christine Lunde) simply reveals that her intent was to kill off all the other hangers-on so that Ludwig would devote his attention to her. Of course, her killing Ludwig doesn't track too well with that motivation. But at least MASQUE ends with a lively set-piece: that of Rebecca fist-fighting Collette for three-four minutes before Collette meets her doom. 

There's nothing special about MASQUE, but production values are decent, Lom has some good moments, and McBride makes her simple character appealing throughout. Devotees of bad acting may be disappointed that Vaccaro isn't terrible, but Frank Stallone's nothingburger role as a Bavarian duke should take up the slack. 

 

SNAKE IN THE CRANE'S SHADOW (1978)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *uncanny*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *sociological*

This title is horribly generic, but I suppose it's slightly preferable to the Taiwanese one, translating to something like "Adventure of the Heaven Mouse."

SNAKE is a slackly plotted "hunt for the valuable object" tale, in which two martial artists with disabilities try to keep the object and the treasure it leads to out of the hands of assorted ne'er-do-wells. This main plotline competes with a B-plot in which three goofballs with no martial skills get in the way of the female fighter and even try to become her students. One of the doofuses is played by familiar face Dean Shek, but the facial recognition doesn't make up for a lot of stupid so-called comedy.

As for the "heroes with disabilities," one is a cripple known as Unicorn (Wen Chiang-long), who's missing a leg, and the other is the blind Dragon Lady (Lung Chung-erh). Damned if I could figure out why either of them devotes their talents to protecting the pieces of a map from various bad guys, but that's what they choose to do. The fights are okay but the only somewhat memorable moments are when one or more of the villains use noise to mess with Dragon Lady's acute senses. The oddest such method is some sort of net studded with hooks, capable of slashing an enemy's face if it makes contact. I believe the enemy wielding this diabolical device was known as the Eight Steps Killer (Lung Tien-Hsiang), but I wouldn't swear to it.

Ironically, some months after this dud, Lung Chung-erh once more portrayed a martially skilled blind woman in the much more entertaining SECRET MESSAGE, aka NINJA MASSACRE. 

STARSHIP INVASIONS (1977)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *drama*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *cosmological, sociological*

I've bagged on a lot on Italian space operas of the 1960s and 1970s, but I'll give them a blanket credit for one thing: they're usually competent about distinguishing the good guys from the bad guys.

STARSHIP INVASIONS, forever to be known as "that terrible flick that came out the same year as STAR WARS, does establish that the flying saucers descending to Earth hold a bunch of bad guys. These humanoids, who boast the title of "The Legion of the Winged Serpent," generally wear black robes embroidered with said serpents, and they've been forced to look for a new planet since a supernova has destroyed their world. All of them are telepaths who never communicate except through thought, so one will see a lot of actors interacting with their mouths closed all the time. Their leader is Captain Rameses (Christopher Lee), who orders some abductions of Earthmen to suss out the natives. The research shows that the Earth-people are somehow descendants of the Legion-race, which I guess somehow plays into the alien leader having the name of an Egyptian pharaoh and using the image of Quetzalcoatl on his robe.

But belatedly the viewer's told that in order to make war on the humans, Rameses must dispose of a small task force of resident aliens, called Zetans. These bald-headed guys represent a galactic-empire-esque "League of Races" who watch over Earth to prevent other ETs from interfering with the protected species of humans. Rameses chats up the leader of the Zetans, pretending to have no hostile intent, and the unspeaking leader apparently avails himself of the Zetans' pet hookers. (The hookers all dress like Vampirella and look like regular Caucasian females.) Rameses then pulls a sneak attack on the Zetans. He fails to wipe them out, though, and for the rest of the movie the two ET forces have seesaw battles until the League defeats the Legion. To say the least, these battles are so desultory that I don't deem the movie combative.

This setup might sound like basic space opera so easy, "even an Italian filmmaker could do it!" But American-born writer-director Ed Hunt executes this Canadian flick with an enervating lack of energy. Lee doesn't help by playing his character as utterly stone-faced, and the two name-actors playing a UFO researcher and his wife (Robert Vaughn, Helen Shaver) are just as boring, but without any external justification for their dullness.

As far as which character is the star of this tired show, I suppose it would be Rameses, who's the representative of his self-interested people. But damn, it's an uninteresting choice.

THE BRIDE WITH WHITE HAIR (1993)

 

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: *good*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: *drama*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTION: *metaphysical, psychological, sociological*

I've screened BRIDE and its sequel a few times before this, but this was the first time I saw the up-front romantic conflict as reflective of a deeper sociological quandary. And although BRIDE was adapted from a 1958 novel, its conflict reminded me of the clash between "order and chaos" as depicted by many cinematic versions of China's "White Snake" folktale, of which the best in my view is 2011's THE SORCERER AND THE WHITE SNAKE.

Both in dubbed and subbed forms, I don't think the script-- co-written by director Ronny Yu-- explicitly maps out the nature of the differences between the two warring clans of BRIDE: the WuDang and the WuShuang. Midway through the film, a flashback establishes that the villains-- the conjoined twins "Male Ji" and "Female Ji" (Francis Ng, Elaine Liu) -- once belonged to WuDang. The twins committed some transgression against WuDang ethics, prompting some of the elders to call for their execution. One elder, Ziyang, pleads for mercy, so that the twins are simply exiled-- though the Jis end up forming their own antagonistic clan, the WuShuang, christened by the twins' surname. 

However, though I don't speak Chinese and don't know precisely what the performers are saying in the film, visually I think Yu *shows* us the aforementioned opposition. WuDang is a clan dedicated to strict orderliness, in which everyone wears dark, sober colors and talks about the necessity to expand their influence over the rival clans. The members of Clan WuShuang wear gaudy clothes and celebrate with wild dances, with at least one woman gamboling about in the nude-- hence, "chaos." Yu never explicitly asserts that the individual can suffer equally from "too much order" as from "too much chaos," but such is the fate of the tragic young lovers.  

The tragedy of the lovers is foreshadowed by a brief frame-story, which I'll address later. Presumably the source novel established the way the two protagonists were raised. Male lover Yihang (Leslie Cheung) is taught martial arts, presumably since his youngest years, by the WuDang Clan, with Ziyang functioning as Yihang's father-figure. Female lover Lien Nichang spent her earlier years as a "wolf girl," but the Ji Twins bring her into the WuShuang Clan. Implicitly the twins teach Lien both martial arts and some sort of magic, but initially their main intention is to use her as a tool in their war with WuDang.

But self-interest muddies the water on both sides. In WuShuang, Male Ji conceives a deep passion for Lien, even though his female half mocks him for thinking he can enjoy normal sexual relations. In WuDang, Yihang gets slightly less overt interference, but the spartan young woman Lu Hua (Kit Ying Lam) makes clear that she's warm for his form. However, Yihang experiences his first stirrings of romance when he meets Lien on the field of battle. Lien is awesome as she whips her way through multiple WuDang soldiers, but what most impresses Yihang is seeing her care for an infant birthed by a dying mother.

It doesn't take long for Yihang to worm his way into the affections of Lien, who hasn't exactly had a long list of boyfriends at this point. In no time, they've plighted their troth, and Lien asks Yihang to swear his love for her. So naturally, the competing factions work to pull them apart, and Lien, feeling betrayed, turns against all humanity, transformed (for reasons never made clear in any version I've watched) into an affect-less white-haired witch. Though the Ji Twins are destroyed by the forces they set in motion, and most of the WuDang is decimated, the lovers remain separated for the next ten years. This is the substance of the frame-story: that for ten years Yihang guards over a unique magical flower that he thinks may return Lien to human status-- and this plays into the narrative of the sequel, released in the same year, albeit with a new cast of support-characters for Cheung and Lin. More on that in a forthcoming review.