MYSTERY MEN (1999), TANK GIRL (1995)

PHENOMENALITY: *marvelous*
MYTHICITY: (1) *fair,* (2) *poor*
FRYEAN MYTHOS: (1) *comedy,* (2) *adventure*
CAMPBELLIAN FUNCTIONS: *cosmological, psychological, sociological*


It's been a long time since I read the short-lived MYSTERY MEN comics-feature, created by Bob Burden as a spin-off from his moderately successful FLAMING CARROT, Thus I'm going only on memory when I remember the original MYSTERY MEN as being a one-joke premise: "here are these maladroit superheroes, who instead of having projecting auras of power. have either crappy powers or none at all, and so give themselves goofy names like 'the Shoveler' and 'the Spleen.'"

Necessarily, a movie script for such a concept needed more development than Burden gave it. The script for the 1999 movie, partly credited to Dark Horse Comics publisher Mike Richardson, attempts to expand on the base idea of the comic. For one thing, all of the action takes place in Champion City, which is, like many cities in classic comics, more of a baroque abstraction of a city. As the name suggests, Champion City exists to provide a backdrop wherein superheroes defeat supervillains in their projects of larceny or destruction. Generally in classic comics, such places sport only one superhero who continually protects his stomping-grounds, and if other superheroes appear at all, they do so as temporary "guest stars."

The Mystery Men of the movie's title-- even though they never precisely take that name within the diegesis-- are initially the Shoveler (who fights with a shovel), the Blue Raja (who throws forks but never knives), and their leader Mister Furious (who gets mad a lot but doesn't seem able to fight). The Mystery Men continually attempt to gain fame for their good deeds, but they're continually overshadowed by Champion's most popular super-doer, Captain Amazing. However, the captain is to some extent a victim of his own fame, for he's licensed his image to many companies to take capitalistic advantage of his popularity. But he's caught and jailed so many super-fiends that he no longer has any challengers, and so the sales of Captain Amazing merch begins to fall off. Thus Amazing decides that he'll create his own "crisis"-- much the way nineties superhero comics resorted to "big events" to goose sales-- by releasing a major foe from prison, in order to catch him again and regain his fame. However, when mad scientist Casanova Frankenstein is freed, the villain turns the tables and captures his superheroic foe.

Meanwhile, the three ne'er-do-wells attempt to build up their numbers, and manage to bring in three new members: the Spleen (who emits toxic gas from his anus), the Invisible Boy (who's only invisible when no one's watching him), and the Bowler (a "legacy hero," in that she inherits the super-bowling talent of her late hero-father). Eventually the maladroit sextet have a run-in with Frankenstein's thugs, and only the lucky invasion of a seventh "mystery man," the Sphinx, saves them. The perpetually angry Mr. Furious gets irritated when the Sphinx attempts to take over the group, but, long story short, the seven heroes manage to come together to invade Frankenstein's sanctum and triumph against the evildoer, albeit with a lot of comic bungling along the way (not least their accidentally killing the hero they've come to rescue).

In terms of the stylized presentation of this fantasy-world, MYSTERY MEN has a lively "music video" look to it (it was the only feature film of video-short director Kinka Usher). The script gives some of the heroes brief character-arcs that would've been impossible in a Burden comic, and of those arcs, the Bowler is probably the most fun, given that she carries around her father's preserved skull in her weaponized bowling-ball. All of the actors get into the spirit of the project quite well, though there's only so much they can do when some of the one-joke concepts run their course.

I've also only brief acquaintance with the Australian comic TANK GIRL, and, again based on memory, I would have to say that the 1995 film does not represent the spirit of the raucous 1988 comics feature. Ironically, though the live-action portion of the film fails to keep the proper tone, there are occasionally cartoon-inserts throughout the continuity, done in the style of the original comics-artists, and these suggest that a full animated feature might've been a better way to go.

It's another post-apocalyptic future, this time caused by a comet that strikes Earth and obliterates a lot of the planet's water-supply, In Australia a tyrannical combine, the Water and Power Corporation, attempts to corner the remaining water market, but they often suffer attacks by mysterious attackers called "Rippers." In addition, Water and Power-- run the megalomaniacl Kesslee (Malcolm McDowell)-- discovers a scruffy little commune with their own well, so they decimate the commune and take prisoner a young woman named Rebecca (Lori Petty). However, during her captivity-- which seems unusually lax-- the Rippers invade the W & P facility and nearly slay Kesslee. With the help of "Jet Girl," a young woman with great mechanical talent, the heroine steals a tank from W & P, at which point she morphs into the titular "Tank Girl." While the two young women go in search of other allies, not least the Rippers, W & P uses extraordinary technology to resurrect Kesslee in a sort of holographic cyborg-body. Naturally, he then wants revenge on everyone associated with his near-death, particularly the defiant Tank Girl.

Budgeted at about $25 million-- incidentally, about a third of MYSTERY MEN's budget-- TANK GIRL looks like a lot less was spent, particularly when the script introduces us to the Rippers, who are (for the most part) humans who have been genetically crossbred with kangaroos. Considering that director Rachel Talalay made a much better movie-- A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 4-- for less than half the cost of TANK GIRL, the fault would seem to lie in an overly jokey script and poor development of characters. Lead actress Lori Petty makes a game try to incarnate the boisterous spirit of the comics-character, but the script gives her only dull psuedo-western cliches to work with. Malcolm McDowell has a considerably easier time of it playing the tyrannical Kesslee, but a strong villain can't save a film with a weakly conceived hero.

Allegedly Talalay is currently attempting to reboot the franchise with a new film. I'd still say that an animated feature would be the way to go, but after the critical embrace of MAD MAX FURY ROAD, a new outing for the girl with the big tank could only be an improvement over this outing.